Cell Phone
For chatting, emergencies, acts of God, etc.. etc... etc
Imagine this.. You're on a blind date. You meet at a nice, classy restaurant... not like the roach infested diner your last date took you to. He even brings flowers.. everything is going great! You think, hey this guy may be second date material. Then it happens... he begins talking about his ex girlfriend.. you know the one who broke his heart, stole his car, used his money to buy her new boyfriend.. who just happens to be your dates brother a lovely new Rolex watch. In 0-20 seconds your once dreamy prince charming blind date dude turns into a woman hating, seething ball of anger... err.. yeah... "waiter.. check.. PLEASE!" No need to make a mad dash to the door, wouldn't wanna set psycho date off. You have your trusty cell phone. While your date is blindly giving his ex bashing epilogue.. text "911 bust a sistah outta here!" to your best friend. Seconds later you get an "urgent" phone call that your cat is stuck in a tree.. yeah... right... umm gotta go! Now imagine if you didn't have your phone... hope you took up track in highschool! Seriously though, you never know when an emergency can arise. Your car could break down, you could be hurt and stranded, you may be a witness to something that needs to be reported to the police. Having a cell phone makes those things so much easier to do.
Stash of some extra Ca$h
You're at the mall.. you forgot your atm card.. those shoes are on sale...
You have your stash of cash handy! Ok ok.. thats a lame reason to use your stashed cash I know. The concept however is right on target. Anything could happen that requires your using cash to cover a transaction. Your debit card could be deactivated (believe me.. my bank has done it many times and have conveniently forgot to inform me), Your car can break down, the convenience store could be experiencing technical difficulties and cannot read your credit card.. for whatever reason, having a little extra cash on hand is a must! Even if you just want to use it to tip the nice tow driver who took the time to drop you off home even though it was against company policy. *wink* Thanks Paul, I owe ya one!
Pad or tampon
Getting your groove on at the company holiday party.... suddenly you feel discomfort in your pelvis. Huh?? it can't be! It's not due for another week! Enough said.. ALWAYS keep some type of period protection on hand. If not for you.. then for your friend that forgot to stash some in her own purse. But that won't happen to any readers of this lens... Knowledge is power! Friends don't let friends travel without one!
Flavored Lip Gloss and a pack of Gum
Ok ladies.. now chew on this. Your husband, boyfriend, sexy fireman neighbor calls you and says.... "Hey, I'm downstairs in the lobby. Wanna go for drinks?" You think to yourself.. whew! I must be smoking! The aroma of sex-ay must be emanating from my being to get such attention from my man! While yes, you might be sexy.. that smoking aroma spewing out from your person isn't your female man magnet charms... its your god awful, stankdafied onion, garlic, tuna surprise breath from that hearty sandwich you had for lunch. No need to fret! You're prepared. Always keep your Trident, Doublemint, Orbit, etc on hand to mask those nasty lunch odors. It's like Febreze for your mouth! Top it off with some lucious sweet berry flavored lip gloss and your after work cocktail date might turn into an all you can smooch lip buffet!
AAA Card
So you pull into the parking lot of your local strip mall, turn off your car then spot a better parking spot closer to the stores. You go to rev up your engine.. and.. nothing. Ok your car won't start... bummer. Thank goodness you have AAA! Call the 1-800 number, tell them where you are stranded and wait... and wait... and.. oh.. WAIT! You're in a strip mall, might as well get your shop on! And with that AAA card you can even get store discounts! It always pays to have AAA.
Sunglasses
Broken heart, not enough sleep, allergy season, I'm too cooool, peeping tom-ette, freaking sun glare, freaking snow glare, hangover, roll in the hay, cat fight gone bad, hiding from your ex.. whatever your reasons... Keep a pair on ya.
Protection
There are so many forms of sexual protection out here today, us ladies have no excuse not to have something on us just in case things get a little hot and heavy. Male condoms, female condoms can prevent the spread of sexually transmitted diseases. If you are having a one night stand.. please use one of these. If you're in a commited relationship but are unsure of your partner.. please use one of these. Overall the choice is yours, you want to make sure that you keep yourself safe. Carrying condoms can actually be a safeguard for you in other ways... who knows.. you rummage through your purse searching for one just when something is about to jump off.. it may allow you time to think twice about the person you're about to sleep with... or it might freak him out and cause him to run away!
Pepper Spray or Mace
Sittin' at the bar in your favorite club.
Dude walks up gives your booty a rub
You turn around 'bout to slap his face,
do him one better spray his arse with mace!
Rolling on the floor hear him scream and curse
Now aren't you glad you keep your mace in your purse?
Hand Sanitizer
It is imperative that you keep hand sanitizer with you at all times. Germs are lurking eeeeverywheeeere. One day you're at the supermarket and it just so happens you pick the cart that some nose picking kid pushed around the store... and where does your hand land? Right smack in his sea of prepubescent boogers. Yuck... hand sanitizer to the rescue!
Wonder Drugs
Nothing Illegal here!!
Stuck in traffic, head pounding.... ouch. If you're anything like me, the forces of nature do all that is possible to make sure that all cars in my state come to a complete halt when I get off work and have either a headache.. or need to go to the bathroom. Now while I cannot relieve myself in my car (I'm still working on a magic driver's seat that allows you to go while you drive), I can take care of minor aches and pains while I'm stuck on the Interstate. Pick your poison! I'm a Motrin girl myself but some people are better off with Tylenol, Aleve or Excedrin. Whatever works best for you, always keep a pain reliever handy... and a bottle of water for that matter. I would not suggest using any medication that makes you drowsy while driving.. that could be bad...
Now that your purse is packed...
I'm sure there are many other things you can think of to place in your purse. I suppose it all depends on what is most important to you. The key is to be as prepared as you possibly can be for all the little loops and big hula hoop sized problems that life can throw at you. Good luck all! Young or old, may your purse be fat and strong!
